Vacatione, pronounced “vacation-ay”, was, as you can imagine, warm, and sunny, and a perfect holiday. I didn’t do much. I ate, I slept, I dreamed of being married to Him. In the most non-sexual way of course. That is, until my period ended and then it was all very sexual. Of course.
In between my feminine wet-dreams, I also made a few New Year’s Resolutions.
To not be Bridezilla. As you will discover in a few posts from now, this one may be much harder to keep than it seems now, in the post-vacation resolute glow I’m in now. My greatest fear (aside from the standard losing a limb, suddenly discovering I’m allergic to cheese, the death of a loved one, discovering a huge zit on D-Day), however, is that I turn into this bridesmaid-ordering-around, nothing-is-perfect weight-throwing-around, glass-throwing wedding crazed crazy girl that destroys my wedding for everyone, including myself. My jaw set, my chin out, I resolutely declare to be anything but.
To lose that weight. Ah yes, you nod your head sagaciously, what’s a blog about New Year’s resolutions, a marriage blog at that, without something as superficial as one’s looks?
But it’s important, people! This is the one time in my entire life, the one time, where I’m to be treated like a celebrity. Photographs every five seconds, dress fittings every ten. I cannot look fat! It is all very well to spout nonsense about looking like one’s normal beautiful self, as one is, but quite another thing to want to look the best one has ever looked. I want people to ooh and aah because I look fabulous.
And that fabulous, folks, was about 35 pounds ago. Yes, I’ve been working on it; this is not a fresh endeavor, so perhaps I should’ve modified the resolution to say “to continue losing weight in a healthy and sustainable way”. But that wouldn’t have sounded as good, yes?
I already, quite virtuously, ignored the monster-sized double chocolate chunk cookie at Quizno’s today. Even though I had even picked it up and was ::this:: close to adding it to my bill. I put it back, stared at it mournfully, felt virtuous for twenty minutes, picked up a cousin monster at Jimmy Johns.
No dinner for bad girls tonight.
Tres et Finalement:
To really, really, enjoy these last few heady months before my life changes forever. I go from unmarried girl to getting married girl to married girl in a matter of months, and life is never going to be like this ever again. I owe it to myself to step out of the bewildering planning, waiting, hoping moods I’ve been in, and really live during these next hundred or so days, committing everything to heart and memory.
It’s never going to be like this again.